


At Your Fingertips, Just out of Reach

by giidas (KatushkaK)



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-07
Updated: 2014-12-07
Packaged: 2018-02-28 13:45:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2734778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatushkaK/pseuds/giidas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He honestly didn’t think Tyler would follow him. Seems he’s wrong about a lot of things lately.</p>
            </blockquote>





	At Your Fingertips, Just out of Reach

**Author's Note:**

  * For [merrin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/merrin/gifts).



> For [urrone](http://urrone.tumblr.com/) \- this turned into something else entirely but hopefully you'll still enjoy it!
> 
> Beta read by me, any and all mistakes are mine.

 

Jamie has big hands, that’s nothing surprising when you look at all of him, really, he thinks, but Tyler. Tyler is tall and muscular and everything, but his hands, it’s not something you’d expect. His fingers are long and quite thick, his palm wide, knuckles prominent. And he keeps waving themaround when he talks and touching his face, running his fingers over his lips. 

 

Jamie is drawn to them, keeps tracking their movement from the corner of his eye (or, well, just keeps tracking their movement, he isn’t naive enough to think he’s stealthy all the time, or even just most of the time) and he wants to grab Tyler’s hand and still it so he can press a palm to Tyler’s. Just to see. Just to compare, you know.

 

He tries very hard not to imagine anything more than that, he really does, but when he wakes up from a dream of Tyler laying him out on a bed and touching him everywhere, pressing his fingers into Jamie’s skin, dragging his palms down Jamie’s thighs, he knows he’s in trouble.

 

(He thinks he knew from the beginning.)

 

~~~

 

Tyler touches everyone, is the thing. Slings an arm over someone’s shoulder, high fives people, hugs them, shakes their hands. There are also subtler moves, of course there are. The fingers to the forearm move, particularly when coupled with Tyler gazing in someone’s eyes, is a killer. Jamie has been subjected to it so many times he constantly wonders how he’s still among the living. 

 

Tyler can make you feel like you’re _the_ most important person. 

 

Like you’re his whole world.

 

~~

 

With all the losses they’ve been going through, it’s not hard for Jamie to draw back a little, give himself a little bit more Tyler-free time, turning him down with brittle excuses. 

 

Tyler doesn’t press him, keeps watching Jamie and waiting, his eyes becoming guarded. 

 

Jamie tries not to think about that too much. Tries to be grateful for the momentary reprieve.

 

Tries to tell himself he doesn’t miss Tyler.

 

(He’s a bad liar.)

 

~~~

 

They manage to pull a win and the whole team is high on adrenaline and relief, all of them ready for a team night out. They agree on their usual hangout, a smaller bar with good beer and better nachos and Jamie thinks they’re lucky it’s a week night as they find a couple of empty tables and a booth.

 

He goes for the booth, Tyler at his heels, sliding onto the seat right behind him, scooting so close their thighs are touching. Tyler smiles at him, big and happy and loose, and squeezes Jamie’s knee, keeps his palm on it. Jamie tries not to focus on the heat of it.

 

Pevs is taking their order, or more just checking that everyone wants a beer, and Tyler answers before Jamie manages to get his voice back,

 

‘A beer for me and the Captain here, yeah,’ and he squeezes Jamie’s knee again, turns to Jamie, ‘right?’

 

‘Sure,’ Jamie thinks his voice sounds mostly normal, and even if it didn’t, the music is loud and no one is really focused on him anyway. Except for Tyler, apparently, whose whole body is now turned towards Jamie, the hand not on his knee now on his forearm, his smile smaller, eyes serious.

 

‘We won, Jamie. I scored, and you scored. The game wasn’t perfect but we did good,’ Tyler is searching his face, his fingers moving on Jamie’s forearm, over the tattoos and Jamie -

 

He has to break the contact somehow, so he sighs and tries to pull his arm from Tyler’s hold, to run his fingers through the mess of his hair. Tyler doesn’t let him.

 

‘Hey, don’t, your hair’s good tonight,’ Jamie is waiting for the chirp, but it doesn’t come, instead a hand moves from his knee to the back of his neck, fingers scratching through the short hair at the base of his skull. And Jamie can’t help it, his fingers clench, his whole body freezing, every muscle coiled tight. He can’t do this, he can’t _take it_.

 

He hears himself say sorry, feels himself elbow his way out of the booth. the guys are probably looking at him, but he doesn’t see them. He just needs to. 

 

Get out of reach.

 

He heads back towards the AAC on foot. His car is there and he didn’t even touch his beer, he can absolutely drive himself home. Go to sleep. Not think about facing Tyler and his hurt guarded eyes tomorrow.

 

He hopes he comes up with a plausible excuse by then.

 

(He doubts it.)

 

~~~

 

He’s about ready for bed when he hears the barking.

 

He honestly didn’t think Tyler would follow him. Seems he’s wrong about a lot of things lately.

 

‘Jamie? Shhhh, Marshall, come on, you’re acting like you haven’t seen him in decades and it’s been hours at most,’ and Jamie can’t keep the fond smile from his face.

 

‘Marshall, come here,’ Jamie raises his voice only a little bit and smiles even more at the quick clack of nails on his floor. Crouches down to get ready for the assault of dog kisses.

 

Marshall comes running and proceeds to slobber all over Jamie’s face and naked chest, jumping on him a little bit, and then Cash finally makes his way to him to, trying to push Marshall out of the way to get his fill of Jamie.

 

‘Don't encourage them,’ Tyler says, all possible reproach undermined by the fact that he crouches down and pets his dogs right along with Jamie.

 

‘Who’s a good boy, who’s a good boy, Marshall? Is it you? Cash, hmm? Are you a good boy? Yes you are!’ Jamie keeps babbling, can’t help himself, and only stops when Tyler presses a palm to his forearm again.

 

‘You're as bad as I am, baby voice and all,’ he says and sounds so fond, so happy, that Jamie’s hurt stutters and he nearly loses his balance and topples backwards when Cash head-buts his thigh.

 

‘I wanted to follow you right away, you know. When you left.’

 

Jamie doesn’t know, can’t look up at Tyler.

 

‘I had to go get these first, though, because I didn’t know if…’ Tyler gets up and tugs at Jamie’s forearm, making him stand up too. He tells the dogs to go to their spots in the living room. They have their bowls and beds there, just as they do at Tyler’s.

 

‘I thought we were on the same page, but then I realized we never really talked about it so maybe we… aren’t?' Tyler says, slow and careful. Jamie is a little confused. He just brushed his teeth and was about to go to bed, he doesn’t think his brain noticed that he’s still awake. It doesn't seem to be processing right.

 

‘Same page?’ he tries to prompt Tyler.

 

‘Yeah, I - with taking - I thought you knew. How I felt. That we were taking it slow because we’re both young and because we have all the time in the world to make it happen,’ his cheeks are a little read, Jamie notes, but his voice is confident, if quiet.

 

Jamie has no idea what’s going on. Or, well, that’s a lie. But he doesn’t dare even think it.

 

‘I have a lot of buddies that I flirt with, yeah, but you’re - And the way you are with me, Jamie,’ Tyler shakes his head a little, fiddles with the leashes he’s clutching in one hand, ‘the only other thing that can make your face light up that way is hockey.’

 

There’s a pause and Jamie-

 

‘And my dogs.’

 

Snorts. He’s stupid about the dogs and he knows it.

 

He makes eye contact, and Tyler is beaming at him as if Jamie just scored the goal that won them the Cup and Jamie’s face must be mirroring that, because Tyler giggles, his head thrown back, his whole body radiating happiness.

 

And Jamie knows. He _knows_ and he thinks he might’ve known for a while but just. Maybe he needed to hear it.

 

Tyler comes closer, drops the leash to the floor and gets his arms around Jamie, one of his big hands gripping Jamie neck, their faces pressed cheek to cheek.

 

‘I thought you knew, that I was being obvious. I think every one knows. They keep calling us _soulmates_ , for fuck’s sake,’ Tyler says, his breath tickling Jamie’s ear, his fingers pressing into Jamie’s skin.

 

‘ _I'm in love with you_ , you moron,’ Tyler breathes, all fondness, squeezing Jamie like he might run out on him again.

 

Jamie’s hands are gripping Tyler’s hoodie, pressing him close, closer, and he feels himself shudder.

 

‘I'm in love with you, Jamie,’ Tyler repeats and Jamie makes a tiny hurt sound, tries to hide his face in Tyler’s neck and his shoulder, but Tyler won’t have that, grabs Jamie’s face in both hands and makes him look up.

 

His fingers are gentle on Jamie’s face, as if it was fragile, precious, and not something other players punched with fists, breaking skin, bruising flesh.

 

‘I'm in love with you,’ _and you’re in love with me_ , Jamie adds to Tyler’s statement, in his head, because it’s implied, it’s in the air, they both know it but Jamie -

 

He thinks about what it felt like, hearing it. Hearing Tyler say the words, seeing it in his eyes, the truth of them.

 

‘Tyler, _Ty_ ,’ and it’s _darling, honey, babe_ in his head.

 

He draws him close, says the words against Tyler’s lips.

 

_I love you. I’m in love with you. Stay._

 


End file.
